While I Wait: What to do before and after the right relationship

Honestly, I haven’t read this in years. Enjoy the read. Tell me what you think. I’m sure there’s some grammar errors, but enjoy it just the same.

Intro

“While I Wait” is special because it’s from an outside looking in perspective. Like most things in life, we are able to see more clearly once we are out of a situation rather then when we are in the middle of it. I’ve noticed a lot about relationships and I’ve also had to notice a lot about myself throughout this waiting period in my life.

Waiting on the right person can be tiring, but what we don’t realize is that it can

be just as tiring when they show up too. So what do we do about it? Instead of spending our days wondering when they’re going to get here, choose to focus on what you need to work on in the meantime.

The great thing about this book is that it addresses issues that happen during the waiting period, the relationship or marriage, and afterwards. Because I can only share so much on the topic of marriage I’ve taken the liberty of sitting with couples who have been married anywhere from a few months to a few decades in order to provide a proper balance of relatability no matter where you are in your life or relationship.

So, for all the married readers, I’m sure you’ll find yourself in here just fine. And what I can say is this: if there were issues before the marriage or relationship that weren’t resolved, they are probably the same issues that keep showing up in your lives.

As a reader, you’re probably wondering, why write a book about relationships? There are already books on the subject, so what makes this one any different? I decided to write “While I Wait” for several reasons. The first was because I really felt that God was not only showing, but sharing amazing things with me about relationships. Let’s face it, we can always use a few relationship tidbits. And even if we can’t, we can use someone to relate to.

My second reason was because I had made so many mistakes in my own relationships. I felt like it would be beneficial to let others know that certain things that you think are important or all about you aren’t when it comes to the relationship. It’s never good to risk any relationship because you think it’s all about you.

My third reason was for accountability. For me, this is the toughest one. I’m being held accountable for the rest of my life for what I decide to say in this book. It’s both exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time. My future marriage will have documented proof of the promises I’ve made even before meeting him.

I hope that everyone who reads this book can take something positive away from it and into their lives. The important thing in all this is to focus on being the best we can be before being a part of someone else’s life. If you’re already married or in a relationship, the important thing is being the best you can be to make that relationship the best it can be. So, as you commit to reading this book, I hope that you’ll make the same commitment to your relationship as well.

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Have a Heart

This book is very near and dear to me. Please enjoy the read. 🙂

Chapter 1  

I sure do love waking up to this man. Look at that skin. That body. He is so much more than I asked for, and I was quite specific in my prayers. But seriously, it is six in the morning! I’m not ready to get up yet.  

“Babe, can’t you just lay down for five more minutes.” And by him laying down, I really mean can I sleep peaceably for another 30 minutes.  

“No, I’ve got to get going, and you need to be right behind me. Plus, you know good and well that five minutes will turn into 30 easily,” he says as he sits up to get out of bed.  

He knows me so well. But since we are kindred spirits I’ve got him pegged too. I look deep into his eyes and pout just enough to seem spoiled, but remind him that my being spoiled is all his fault. He slides back into bed.  

“Ten minutes, then I have to get up,” he whispers from behind me.  

“Great. Fifteen minutes it is.”   

I’m sure he can hear the smile in my voice. As I doze off I hear him quoting Proverbs 31. 

“Her husband praises her: There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all.”  

I sure hope I do…  

*** 

7:00 am came faster than ever. By the time I’m half awake, he’s dressed and ready to go. I wonder if all men can do that or if that’s just his thing. If he decides to be up and ready by 7:00 am, then he will be. It’s so simple, but I love his decisiveness. Plenty of men can be decisive, but not like my husband. I like to believe that everything about him that fascinates me is something that only he can be capable of. I am completely enamored by this man. I love him. Plain and simple. I love my husband. 

“What,” I ask as he interrupts my thoughts. 

“Did you enjoy your extra 30 minutes of sleep?” 

“Thirty? It felt like five,” I say with a yawn. 

“Well, regardless it’s time for you to get up. I put some coffee on for you too. I’m running behind so I’ve got to get going.” 

I don’t understand why he looks so panicked. He’s never late. Ever. As I watch him rush around, I sit up in bed and interrupt his flow by reaching out to him. 

It’s no lie that it feels like time stands still when he reaches back. I can’t explain the wave of emotion I feel when he stops everything he is doing to grab my hands and kiss me. And when he pulls away looking into my eyes and says he loves me, I feel full. I need nothing more than that to convince me of his love. 

With that, I repeat the words, I love you, and steal another kiss before he gathers himself to leave the bedroom. And when he leaves and I hear the door closing, I lean back onto my bed and smile. I’m glad I left that little note in his car, and I promise I can feel his smile right now. 

I love you so much. Have a great day today and I hope to see you soon. Thank you for loving me. I love the God in you. And I love that you have put Him in our marriage. 

Something in me felt like sneaking him a note for work today when we were riding home from dinner last night. I didn’t want the night to end, so I hoped I could carry it over into today. As I hear the door again, I see it was very much worth it. 

He enters the room, laughs and says, “I knew you weren’t up!” Then he grabs me by the hands and kisses me.  

Yep, the note was very well worth it, I think to myself. 

As we part he says, “I love you and I have to go for real this time.” And like a kid, I get up and watch him leave. 

I laugh to myself on my way to the bathroom thinking about how much work it took for us to get to this point. Marriage is one of my better ideas, but definitely isn’t my easiest one. 

No matter how much people tell you, you’ll never know until you’re in the middle of it. It’s two people who have grown to be the person that they had been developing into for some 20-30 years now saying, “OK, let’s learn how to live with another person all over again.” 

Marriage is very different from living with family, it’s two people who have learned what they don’t want to compromise about themselves, having to compromise. God truly has to bless a marriage to make it work. This one would definitely be doomed without Him. That’s for sure. 

*** 

Looking in the bathroom mirror he groans as he pops his morning pills. 

“Who could rest with all these chest pains? Then I have to wake up to a counter of medicine after it all. The life I’ve always dreamed of…” 

I can hear my dad now “medicine is for wimps.” After all my trying to appease him, I guess I’m still a wimp. I even chose a “manly” profession because it seemed so unwimpy. Construction. Hard hats. Nothing wimpy about that. 

Yet, here I am. Staring at a counter of wimpy prescription pills for an inherited heart disease. What are the odds? 

I officially have hit bottom I think. A profession that I can’t even do because of a bad heart. My doctor has basically forbidden me from any work until a donor comes up. I’ve not given much thought to that. I’ll probably be good and dead by the time I get a donor. 

Life with someone else’s heart… I guess the truth is that I couldn’t imagine it, much less anticipate it. Won’t happen anyway. I’ve been waiting over a year, and I know someone has been waiting even longer than me somewhere.

Study this Book

Genesis 50:20 You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.

Be encouraged. What is a wonderful, almost perfect way to sum up the book of Genesis and the story of Joseph’s life is verse 20. It is one of the most well-known scriptures, and if you read the story of Joseph you will understand even more so what makes this verse so powerful.

A quick rundown is that Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery. Some awful things happen to Joseph, but through it all God is with him and eventually elevates him to second in command over all of Egypt. Read the story in Genesis to get the full picture because that summary pales in comparison to the full the story. However, maybe you get the picture of the hope in this verse.

Hopefully, this verse is encouraging in your life for something you’re facing or for someone you know who is going through the ringer. No matter what, God can turn it around. And even those who mean evil can witness God using it in your favor.

It’s nice to know that the evil intent of your enemies can be the hopeful expectation of what God is going to do for you. Think about it this way. As unfortunate as the pain is, God can use it. So when you think about it, what happens now is that you get to see God all the more in your situation. And when God turns it around, seeing those people will only remind you of how good God is.

 

From the Study this Book Devotional.

Election Infection: Is Politics the New Religion?

 

We’re infected by the political bug.

Politics has power in this country. It has more power than we would care to admit it actually. For example, politics has the ability to change the way I see you and vice versa.

Think about it. When you hear someone say they’re a Republican or Democrat, what comes to your head? Do you automatically feel like they support something that you don’t? Do you feel like you will now have to change the conversations you have because of their party? Do you feel a little more defensive than you once were?

I’ll be honest, for me, when I hear someone say they associate with a particular party, I begin to form my opinions. How could they support that? Or how can they be a part of that? It’s no wonder they felt like that about guns… All of a sudden their track record is either up for question or now begins to make sense, simply because they identified a political party.

Is my thought process wrong for doing that? Absolutely. Is politics to blame for my jumping to conclusions? No. Does politics help to not jump to conclusions? No. Thus we have a society of people who are drawing conclusions about people because of their association with a party.

Super Camp

So, this is an accountability factor, because this week I’m publishing excerpts for upcoming books I’ve been working on. These are very near and dear.

This one is Super Camp, something my summer campers inspired.

Chapter 1: Getting to Know You

Ms. Wonder’s Super Camp was the best every summer. The kids this year were super excited to be in her camp. Camp was already buzzing about what had happened the night before.

“Did you see the news last night?”

“I’m a kid, of course I didn’t watch the news.”

“Well, you missed it. There was a burning building and somebody ran in and saved another kid that was stuck inside. No one knows who it was.”

“Yeah. And last week a kid was lost and standing in the middle of traffic. Somehow, someone stretched out and pulled the kid from the street before a bus came.”

“Well, this morning I heard on the radio someone walked into a pool to save a kid who fell in while he was playing outside.”

“How cool would it be to help people like that?” chimed in Ms. Wonder. “Welcome to Super Camp kids. Please have a seat, and let’s get to know each other a little better.”

Just then the lights cut off in the camp.

“What’s happening now? Ugh, that storm has caused so many power outages.”

Bzzzzz. The lights were back on.

Knock knock.

“Come in,” said Ms. Wonder.

“Sorry, I’m late. My name is Madison.”

Ms. Wonder smiled. “Nice to meet you. We were just starting introductions. I’m glad you could make it during that brief outage.”

“Outage? Oh, yeah. The electricity.”

“Alright class, everyone have a seat, let’s begin.”

Everyone sat at the tables.

“My name is Ms. Wonder. Super Camp is special to me because we make sure we select the best kids we can. Each child has something special to offer to our camp, and I always look forward to seeing what it is and so do your peers. So let’s start with Madison, we know your name, but what else can you tell us?”

Madison stood up, “Well, I love reading and writing, I really like studying about electricity, lightning, and other power sources. I think that stuff is really cool, in fact my friends and family call me Electric Girl.”

“Cole Dawson is my name. I love coloring, especially dinosaur pictures. And I love playing outside. Sometimes it feels like I was made to be outdoors.”

“Lily Foster. I love doing science and math projects.  I know it sounds boring, but I think it’s cool.”

Ms. Wonder began to speak, “Well class, we have a few more kids coming to camp, but this is a great start for intros.”

“Excuse me,” a voice said clearing its throat.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t see you there. It’s like you came out of nowhere,” Ms. Wonder said with a smile.

“Ha! I get that sometimes. My name is Silas Brown. I love reading Captain Underpants books.”

“Ha, ha. Well they certainly are creative books. That’s for sure. Well, I think these children walking in are the last of class. Come on and have a seat.”

“I’m Esteban Blake. I like volcanoes. Lily is my cousin.”

“My name is Aiden Lucas. I like robots and playing air hockey.”

“Hi everyone, my name is Nevaeh. I love math and reading.”

“And lastly, we have Mr….”

“Colton Brody. I love to draw and my favorite channel is the weather channel. It’s pretty random, but those tornado chasers are entertaining.”

Ms. Wonder stood up. “Well, I think that’s it for intros. Does anyone esle have anything interesting to share or add to their introduction?”

The students looked around…

“Anybody?” asked Ms. Wonder.

Still, silence.

“Well, I’m sure there’s something you each have that’s super interesting. Why else would you be at Super Camp?”

DAUGHTERS

So, this is an accountability factor, because this week I’m publishing excerpts for upcoming books I’ve been working on. These are very near and dear.

The first one is D.A.U.G.H.T.E.R.S.

 

                                                              Introduction

      What does it mean to be a daughter? That was the question. And although I had come up with this acronym that was great, that was inspiring and encouraging, I’d never really asked myself what it meant to be a daughter.

      What did it mean? What did it mean to not just be any daughter, but to be the daughter of a King?

      That’s when I realized that maybe I didn’t fully know. That maybe I hadn’t sat down and thought about what it really meant to belong. Because isn’t that part of being a daughter? Having a sense of belonging to someone, to some family? Yet, here I was claiming to belong to a family without a full understanding of my role as a daughter in it.

      We live in a world where the impression of a father figure stirs up pain instead of persistence. Where the lack of a present father has left women damaged instead of dynamic, as they search for that sense of belonging throughout life. Unfortunately, understanding that we have a loving Heavenly Father has lost its appeal due to the lack of zeal in our earthly ones.

      Not only that, but we live in a world where mothers find it hard to encourage their daughters and prepare them for the struggles ahead. Due to the growing demands of life, we force ourselves to grow into women as soon as possible and shed the skin of girlhood.

      Therefore, as endearing as the term daughter was meant to be, it is instead replaced with the idea of childlikeness instead of maturity. And for many of us that’s a problem.

      However old you are, you are a daughter. God is King and a loving, Heavenly Father. And as His daughter, you are a princess. And if the term daughter casts images of a child in your head, it’s OK, because God loves children. And God loves you.

      You matter. And it is my hope that by the end of this book you will be able to come to grips with just how much you matter. Although, there is still so much to share and learn on the journey to self-discovery for your identity as a daughter, we will focus on the acronym, D.A.U.G.H.T.E.R.S.

      Daughters are dynamic, authentic, unique, gracious, hopeful, triumphant, empowered, resilient, and successful. While these descriptions are personality types, they also represent who or what we can be in situations or circumstances. Each word chosen represents a powerful personality trait, not to be taken lightly. With each trait described, we will look at a woman from the Bible who I believe displayed this type of character.

      I can put words on the pages, but it will ultimately be up to you to discover what being a daughter means in your life at this particular time. As a daughter, you have power. As a daughter, you belong to an Almighty King. And as His daughter, you have the right to display that power for your Father’s glory.

      So, what does it mean to be a daughter? Let’s find out.

 

People are Like Chocolates

Forrest Gump’s momma always said life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get. I think people are like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get with people.

People are just different. No matter how well intentioned people can be, you still just don’t know what you’re going to get. Yeah, in a lot of ways people are predictable, but our thought processes and overall outcomes on things can throw you for a loop.

So, since we’re all capable of throwing each other for a loop, why not embrace the differences that make us unique? First off, it’s easier and less stressful. I’m not talking about embracing sins that make differences, I’m talking about embracing the uniqueness of each other.

If everyone was like me, it would be boring. I can not be boring, but for the most part, I like my life being simple. I’m never bored, but I certainly would be if everyone was like me. And in knowing that, it should make it a little easier to accept people who are different than me, because they challenge to think differently and to see a different perspective.

In a world of boxes of chocolate, it’s OK to be different. We need milk chocolate, we need dark chocolate, we need white chocolate, etc. When they’re the right brand, all of them are good. For the most part, you’ll hopefully meet more people who are good than are bad, and they’ll be all kinds of different types of chocolate.