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Hide and Seek

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Jeremiah 29:13 

“If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the Lord. 

When things aren’t going our way, we have this strange idea that God is playing a game of Hide and Seek. It’s like no matter how many times we count and throw in the towel, He still refuses to come out.

As hard as it is to believe, God isn’t hiding from us. In fact, it’s in those moments that we spend calling out for Him that we actually begin to find Him.

The issue is that once we count to 100, we want it to be over. We don’t really want to study Him and search for Him, we just want Him to come out. No effort on our part. Which is quite the opposite of what He wants.

There’s a reason God said if you search for Me wholeheartedly, you will find Me. And I think that knowing that we may find the answer we don’t want, or the path we’d rather not take makes us not want to search wholeheartedly. Subconsciously, we know that if we search for God, we really will find Him.

So the question isn’t where is God, but where are you? Who’s really hiding here? Us or Him?


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My husband and I ran into each other at church one Sunday. This was obviously before we were dating and this was the first time we had seen each other since high school. And he looked at me.

He looked at me like I was the only person in the building. He looked at me like he had been looking for me since high school and finally had found me. He looked at me like no one had ever looked at me.

All week I thought about how he looked at me. And whenever I saw his name in an old yearbook or on Facebook I would go back to that moment. The moment when he looked at me. And a peaceful smile would come on my face.

Years later when we started dating, unlike my usual dating scheme I put all the games aside and volunteered honesty. You know, cause usually it’s the don’t ask, I ain’t telling playing field. But for some reason it was different. So I voluntarily told him, “You know, you looked at me some kind of way when I saw you at church that Sunday. I can’t describe it, but it was completely different than any look I’ve ever experienced. You seemed genuinely happy to see me.”

I say all that to say, that like most huge life decisions we always wonder. Did I do the right thing? Was the timing right? What now?

But when I think about my marriage and God’s presence in my dating relationship with my now husband, I’m taken back to that day. See, the peace of God surpasses all understanding. And there was a pleasant peace in my heart  when I saw Brandon that day and he looked at me. And still today, when I think of that moment, I feel this peace come over me all over again.

I guess what I’m saying is that when God orchestrates your decisions, you can still feel the peace of the moment even after it’s long passed, because His peace surpasses all understanding and is not like the world gives (Philippians 4:7; John 14:27).

Brandon and I don’t have a perfect relationship. I’m hard to live with. And we disagree. Not because we want to, but because we are two completely different people. But there is one thing we have always had in common, and that’s God. Because God is our common factor we can experience true love and peace.

Is it easy being loving all the time? No. Does everything go just right so I can be in a constant state of peace? Not hardly. But neither of those things are circumstantial either. What I’m saying is, I serve a God that can remind me of a peaceful moment from the past, that can still result in peace in the present, even when my current circumstances are anything but that.

My marriage may not be perfect, but my God is. And because He is perfect and we are married to glorify Him, we have a better chance at a “perfect” marriage than we would have by trying to make it happen on our own. We need God. And with the truth of knowing that we need God, comes His peace.


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Don’t Look Back

You can’t move forward looking back.

I’m sure that has been said by many, but the most important person to say it to me was my grandmother. Therefore, it stuck.

I read about Sodom and Gomorrah today, and Lot’s wife made that phrase all the more true to me. You really can’t move forward looking back. Sometimes that one glance back is what leads to that backsliding.

Longing for that one more time when you know you shouldn’t have done it at any time, is what can be habit-forming again. One look back can always be one too many.

Lot’s wife had one look back. One more longing for what was all too familiar for some very wrong reasons. That one look cost her the ability to look ahead into her future. A future leading from sin. The result, she was turned into salt.

How many of us would be salt for our looks back?

I have to be real. I look back far too much. I look back at that relationship, that job, that time I wanted my way, etc. And I am seriously wondering, what for? When God is ahead of me why on Earth would I ever look behind me? Isn’t it crazy?

What could possibly be so important behind me that it should take away my focus on God ahead of me? Nothing. In God, there need only be forward progress. We should all be so thankful that we don’t lose our lives when we look back in longing for those very things that God is saving us from.

Genesis 19:26

But Lot’s wife looked back as she was following along behind him, and she became a pillar of salt.

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