Being the person I am. I think I overthink. Ha ha. And the more I think about getting married, the more I think about all that I leave behind. And I don’t mean that in a bad way. I mean I just think of it as a closing story. Not as just a new chapter but a new book altogether.
For example, my last name. I’ve thought about this before I was in a relationship, but putting Chanel Cobb on my work won’t be anymore. Everything I do up until I’m married will be the last work I do with that name. What I’ve accomplished up until this point will be Chanel Cobb’s accomplishments.
That’s really big of my parents to love the man that I love. It’s special that they trust him to change my name. The legacy we have, and all that is special about that name won’t be over, but it will be different for me.
And then I think about him. I think about how special it is that he wants me to have his name. How important it is to start a legacy of our own now. I think about all that a name has meant, means, and will mean now. I think about the trust that it takes to give someone your name. You’re trusting that they will take care of it. In the old days, all some people had was their name. And if their name meant nothing, then they felt they meant nothing.
And then just when I want to get overwhelmed, I don’t. I start to feel confident about this change. I feel confident in Christ, knowing that my most important name will never be changed, Child of God. I feel confident in this relationship, knowing that it was blessed by God. I feel special. And then I begin to truly realize that in the midst of all these blessings I also have Brandon’s trust. Brandon is trusting me. He’s trusting me with something that won’t change in his life, his name.
He is giving me his name and I will defend its honor.