We live and breathe and want God to be with us. But for some reason we don’t want God to show us the junk in us. We want God to tell us everything that is good about ourselves and never to show us where we’re lacking. And all He is saying is, “I love it ALL. I love your junk. And I need you to acknowledge and understand it’s there so you can see how powerful I am. So you can see how I can change all your junk into something good for me.”
God wants to know that I know how to need Him. And not just that, but how much I need Him.
We are quite selfish when it comes to God.
It’s like we’re saying, “God, please move that mountain, oh and could you get those pebbles too while you’re at it.” Not admitting that the pebbles along the way are the things about us that need some work on our journey to the mountain.
We want the job, but don’t want to appreciate the one we have. We want the man/woman, but don’t want to unlearn our selfish ways for a relationship. We want the money, but don’t want to acknowledge that we don’t know how to manage what we have.
I need God. I need God to help me appreciate. I need God to teach me to compromise. I need God to manage everything. And I need to admit that I need Him in every way He is available to me.
And once I see all that is me. All that is good, and all that is messy. All that needs work. All that is less than pleasing. Then and only then can I know what I need to specifically ask God for.
God reveals to me what I need to work on, then He even tells me what I need to ask for, and then I get to see Him work. I get to turn it all over to Him and be used by Him. I get to see Him turn my unkindness into kindness. I witness compromise taking place. And I experience appreciation at its highest level.
The more God reveals to me about myself, the better I become. Always.
The less time I spend thinking I have it all figured out. The better I become. Always.
God sent Jesus for me. He knew I would struggle. He knew I would get messy. So before I even knew it, Jesus had already come for my mess. And you know what, sometimes, the biggest mess I make, is thinking that I didn’t make one.
Mark 2:17 (NLT)
17 When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”